Of good intentions and roads to hell
by JantoXDrose
Summary: A sequel to my story "The importance of being with Jack" Ianto and Gwen are ready to go back to work after an year of maternity leave. But between saving the world, aliens, new team members and family problems can Ianto and Jack finally be happy?
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer: I don't own Torchwood and do not make profit from my fanfiction.**

**A huge thank you to my beta shinee1234 for her work. so here is the sequel.**

It was an year since Ianto and Gwen had left Torchwood on maternity leave and even if gwen didn't leave to big a gap that needed to be filled iantos absence did. They were two people down and needed to recruit more so despite Jack reluctance he had recruited Andy Davidson, ex PC and Gwen's old partner in the police, to fill in for gwen as field agent and police liaison. John Hart stopped once in a while for the last couple of months, Jack had to call him and the Doctor a few times and in the end John decided that if Jack wanted him on the team he will stay permanently. Or semi permanently as it turned out because from time to time the Doctor came and swiped him away. Jack knew that there was time when he would have been hurt and jealous that the Doctor never did this for him, but now he had a family to take care of and a Welshman to marry. Admittedly they still haven't started planning the wedding properly. Ianto seemed a bit depressed and Jack was worried. People told him that it was normal for a newly given birth person to have a post natal depression but it should have passed in a few weeks or at worst a couple of months, but it didn't. Ianto was still moving as if through fog, not really paying attention to Jack, not wanting intimacy and being constantly tired. The only thing he didn't slack on was taking care of the twins. There at least Ianto was as careful as he had ever been. Jack was still worried thought.

Maybe Ianto wasn't made for staying at home with the kids, maybe he needed to work, be useful and save the world. That is why in the end Jack agreed to Ianto coming back to work soon, despite not being very convinced that Ianto was 100% ready yet. But Gwen was coming back and Jack knew how it will affect ianto if he knew that but was refused a chance to get back to work himself and be shut taking care of children for much longer. So now they were looking at nurseries and childminder groups for the twins and Ianto was going to be back to work in no longer than two months.

Jack missed him around the Hub anyway, so he was a bit exited to have his lover back, he just didn't know how he will be able to wait for another two month. The Hub had sank in its pre Ianto state with some litter around and unfiled papers. To Andy's credit he did try to maintain it relatively clean and file his reports correctly, but he just wasn't Ianto despite looking positively delicious in this jeans and leather Jacket. He really didn't know how Gwen could have chosen Rhys when Andy was interested in her.

Owen and Tosh had finally gone on that date and a few weeks ago Tosh had moved to live with Owen and announced that she was two weeks pregnant. It was something to be celebrated in the Hub and things seemed to be going very well, but now they would have a tech vacancy in a few months. It seemed that for the first time in the Torchwood's history no agents were dying but they all were conceiving. If only Jack could do something to lift Ianto's mood.


	2. Chapter 2

Ianto Jones loved his children, really he did, but he also liked for everything to be in order. That is something that children do not possess. There had been a time, when, if you asked Ianto how much baby piss or other fluids and food was acceptable on a shirt he would have said none. But after a year of raising his children, he would now reply that as long as it is not clearly visible and doesn't smell too much a little is acceptable. After all, a parent cannot be expected to change their clothes all the time. Before, he used to wear smart suits and expensive jeans and shirts; now he wore a Primark top and H&M jeans for everyday use.

He couldn't remember the last time he had a normal conversation that didn't involve what he was cooking for dinner, whether it be for himself and Jack or the kids, or even what the kids had done during the day. His days included a monotonous routine of waking up, preparing breakfast, sending Jack to work, doing some housework before the kids wake up and feeding them. The only star on the horizon was when he took the kids to the playgroup, where he could chat with other parents. However, all the other parents talked about kids as well, and it was sad. Once in a while he would meet up with Rhys and Anwen there and think how lucky Gwen was. It made him even more depressed and added to his stress. He was already tired and irritable. He even snapped to two teenagers in the supermarket and swore at one builder for no reason. Of course, the kids went and remembered the words. Next day when Jack tried to discipline them, Gray told him to piss off. Ianto groaned, feeling even more irritable. He couldn't even be a good parent.

Gwen was back at work from that day while he was stuck at home, Ianto knew that Jack was getting annoyed with his insecurities about Gwen, but he couldn't help it. After all she had done, she was allowed back to work, but he had to stay at home like a housewife. Ianto even saw Gwen at the shops once. She looked as sexy as before her pregnancy while he still had some extra pounds he had to lose. They've had a lot of trouble with Jack lately because of Ianto's depression. The last time Jack had caught him harming himself. He hadn't done this since he was teenager, but he needed the release of the physical pain to escape from the emotional stress. It was just unfortunate that Jack had seen him that time. Jack hadn't yet noticed that Ianto hardly ate or that he had other methods to hurt himself by and not only cutting. How could he know really when he was hardly ever at home. There were times when Ianto would wake up in the late hours of the night and Jack's side of the bed would be cold. Ianto knew that it wasn't fair to blame Jack, but he couldn't help but wonder how many times it was because Torchwood was just too busy, and how many were because Jack was bored of him and was somewhere else.

This morning Jack's alarm on his vortex manipulator went off and he ran out the house before he had finished his breakfast. The kids were still sleeping and he really wanted to know what was going on because he was sick of being out of the loop and needed something to distract him. He took the baby monitor with him and made his way to the garage. He had fitted a connection with the hub's mainframe for a laptop in the garage with the help of Tosh. Accessing the system, Ianto tried to find the latest case when he heard the babies wake up and start crying. He debated closing off the search and going to check on them, but then decided that a few minutes in there bed wasn't going to hurt them. He stayed in the garage and kept searching. Apparently some group called The Night Travelers were causing Torchwood trouble, or at least that was what Tosh had logged into the Hub's database. Four people were in hospital in a coma and these creatures were on the loose. A moment later he heard the door to the house opening through the baby monitor, and thought of going to see who it was, but the kids stopped crying and he heard Jack's voice over it.

"What are you two doing here all alone?" Jack asked puzzled. "Where is your tad, eh?"

Ianto could hear that Jack was annoyed. Jack had a right to be; he shouldn't have left the kids alone in the first place, and he knew he shouldn't have. What if it wasn't Jack that came at the house? He was starting to feel extremely guilty and closed off the search to go back inside. Jack had put the twins in their chairs on the table and left them to try and eat their own food. Ianto sighed inwardly, just like every toddler, they were really messy when they eat and it was going to be him cleaning again.

Jack met him at the door with a frown and had his hands on his hips.

"What the bloody hell were you thinking, leaving them alone like this?" Jack shouted at him. Not even a good morning first. Ianto almost pointed that out, but decided that he was in enough trouble already. "Where were you?"

"I was only in the garage," Ianto said defensively. "And I had the baby monitor with me. I knew it was you."

"Well, what if it wasn't?" Jack demanded. "I came back because there is that group of travelers who take the souls and the tears away. Wanted to make sure you lot were ok. What is wrong with you lately?"

"But it was you. And the garage is just on the other side of the house."

"I don't care! You can't just leave them alone like this," Jack snapped. "I don't know what is going on with you lately, but you need to pull yourself together."

Ianto opened his mouth to answer and then snapped it shut. He silently took a calming breath, as if it were just that easy. As if he just wanted to be miserable and stressed and now that Jack gave him an order he was obliged to obey!. As if he hadn't tried to pull himself together.

"Yeah, as if you would know. You are never here," Ianto shouted leaving Jack stunned. He turned around and slammed the door going back to the garage.


	3. Chapter 3

**Disclaimer: I don't own anything but the twins. **

**A/N: A big thankyou to my beta shinee1234 for all the help and work. **

When Ianto had stormed off, Jack was left feeling very lost at first and then he felt like a total jerk. He knew that Ianto was unhappy and he had noticed it. He also knew that he had to do something about it, but he was so busy with Torchwood lately. First Owen had almost died at the Pharm and i it wasn't for Adam, they would have lost Owen and Tosh would've been a single mom in a few months. Then Andy caught an alien virus and now this trouble with the night travellers. At least Gwen was back now, and that may be why Ianto is so stressed lately. Jack had thought that coming back to work sooner might actually help Ianto feel better. He just wasn't sure that Ianto was mentally ready, but then again, Ianto had always dealt with problems by working hard. Like with the situation after Lisa's death. Or maybe he wasn't dealing with it; maybe he was only repressing it and now had gotten to this stage. What had come over him that he had to leave the children alone?

Jack's vortex manipulator beeped again, alerting him to another sighting of the night travellers. After sending Gwen a message that he would be there as soon as he could, he quickly cleaned up the children's' chairs and put all the waste in the bin bag to take out to the garage.

As soon as the garage door opened, Ianto slammed his laptop shut because he didn't want Jack to see that he was spying on what the team was doing instead of thinking about changing the kids' nappies. He had seen the alert and was expecting Jack to come and handover the twins to him.

"Emergency?" Ianto asked when Jack left the pram beside him.

"Yes, but when I come back we need to talk."

"What's there to talk about Jack?" Ianto said tersely and pushed the pram past Jack and out of the garage. "I'm going for a walk, and then going to Rhiannon's. I'll talk to her and see if she will look after Hope and Gray. We can hire her as a nanny, then I can come back to work starting tomorrow."

"What?" Jack ran after Ianto and stopped him with a hand on his arm. "You're not ready for this Ianto. You need professional help. You're self harming and you don't eat properly…I can't risk you not being completely healthy, with the job we do."

"Didn't you have an emergency?" Ianto asked and tried to shrug Jack's hand off his arm.

"They will wait or work without me," Jack said keeping his hold a bit forceful.

"I don't need professional help!" Ianto shouted and tried to pull himself off again. "I just need to do something different instead of changing nappies and going to playgroups. And since when are we more important than work emergencies? It really didn't look like that for the last few months. Where were you those nights when the kids woke up with stomach aches or teething pains?"

Jack's winced at Ianto's words and he knew that Ianto was right, but he had a responsibility to this city and he couldn't leave his team alone to deal with things. If Tosh was pregnant and still working, he could do this too, but it seemed he had hurt Ianto deeply with his actions. He reflexively tightened his hold on Ianto.

"You're hurting me." Ianto hissed at him angrily.

Jack let go of him and stepped back feeling disgusted with himself for hurting Ianto.

"I'm sorry love," Jack said shakily. "There's just so much to deal with at the Hub. Owen almost died if Adam hadn't been there…" Jack shook his head. "And you're always moody and I didn't want to see the bloodied towels after you sneaked off to cut yourself in the middle of the night, so it was easier to work."

"Easier for who Jack?" Ianto asked with tears in his eyes. "For you?"

"Yes. For me." Jack answered feeling guilty. "I'm so sorry Ianto."

"Do you still trust me Jack?" Ianto asked, looking Jack in the eyes.

"Of course I do."

"Then let me talk to Rhi and let me come back to work tomorrow," Ianto pleaded.

"Okay."

"Oh, and Jack?" Ianto asked turning around to look back at Jack. "Who's Adam?"

Jack looked confused for a moment.

"What do you mean who's Adam?" Jack asked sounding even more confused than Ianto. "You can't tell me you don't know him? He's been working for Torchwood for 3 years, oh and Andy is his boyfriend now. Don't you remember him?"

"No, I don't" Ianto said. He shook his head, looking very confused.

"It might be because of the retcon Gwen gave you."

"Can't be," Ianto protested. "You would've mentioned him during the year, and this is the first time you're mentioning him. When you talk about missions, you've mentioned Tosh, Owen, John Hart, Andy and even Martha, Mickey and Gwen, but you have never mentioned Adam."

Jack shrugged, "Must've forgotten, then."

"Where was he when I gave birth?"

"On a holiday I think." Jack said vaguely starting to feel very confused himself after all these questions from Ianto. Now that he thought about it for some reason he couldn't remember what exactly Adam had done a year ago, it was all a bit fuzzy really. He shook his head and decided that it must be due to all the stress. After all Adam was his best friend and the only one he could tell about Ianto's self harming tendencies and he had helped him through the nights when he didn't want to face Ianto. Adam had even sacrificed his nights at home with Andy to keep him company for a few drinks.

"Right," Ianto said, not convinced. "Now, shoo, you have an emergency to attend to."

Jack smiled hesitantly.

"Are we good?" he asked.

"Not really, but we will be," Ianto assured him and Jack jumped back in the SUV and sped towards the bay.

Ianto let out a sigh and resolved that he would go back to work tomorrow, and solve the Adam mystery. Maybe that might even help him to regain some normality again. And wasn't that twisted when you think of the Torchwood life as the normal one.


	4. Chapter 4

**Disclaimer: I don't know anything the show belongs to BBC. **

When Jack came back from the emergency at Torchwood, Ianto was already dead to the world and the twins were sleeping. He sighed with dissapointmet, he hoped that he would be able to talk to Ianto this night when he gets back home before Ianto had insisted to get back to work tomorrow but it probably wasn't going to happen. He thought briefly of getting into bed and sleeping for a couple of hours, but he was to wind up from the case especially from the fact that he and Gwen had managed to save only one boy. Gwen was very distraught by the fact that she let go of the flask and lost the souls of the other people leaving a small boy and orphan. She wanted to stay at work because she had no one to go to and get the pain out of her chest, but Jack had told her to go home. Maybe see if Rhys will talk to her and take Anwen for a few hours. Jack hopped it was enough.

He hoped that he would be able to talk to Ianto about this as well, but he didn't want to wake up Ianto. Sighing again he turned around, quietly closing the door behind himself and took the phone out.

"Adam?" Jack greeted when a sleepy voice answered him. "Can I talk to you?"

"Hi, Jack," Adam answered him sounding reluctant. "I hope this is important because I was just falling asleep and you almost woke up Andy."

"It is important," Jack said. "I…I just feel so lost. You know the argument with Ianto, and the case. I just need to talk to someone. I am sorry."

"No, that's fine," Adam said. "You know that I'm always here for you. Just tell me where to go."

"The roof of the gas station," Jack told him.

He felt guilty for leaving Ianto again, but he needed to talk to someone and Adam was the one person that could understand him. He made his way down the stairs as quietly as he could and hoped that he haven't woken Ianto up, another bold of guild almost doubled him in two, but he kept on going and out of the door.

When he arrived at the roof, Adam was already waiting for him there.

"You are fast," Jack remarked. "What did Andy say about you leaving in the middle of the night again?"

Adam waved Jacks concerns with is hand. He knew it wasn't the first time that he had left Andy in the middle of the night much the same way that jack had left Ianto. If Andy didn't know that Adam knew Jack for longer than him and nothing had happened he would probably be jealous. He wasn't still Jack thought that Andy would be annoyed.

"Don't worry. He didn't like it much, but he knows that I love him and will get over it." Adam said putting a hand on Jack's shoulder. "But we are here to talk about you not me."

"Yeah" Jack sighed. "I had an argument with Ianto today, on top of everything. He wants to come back tomorrow."

"But you know he is not ready," Adam protested.

Jack sighed heavily and sat on the edge of the roof letting his legs dangle over the edge. Adam followed him and sat beside him in the same position, but leaned backwards on his elbows and looked up at the sky.

"What if something happens? Hope and Gray need him, you are the one always rushing around to keep them safe, he should be resting at home until he is ready. You told me that you found him throwing up a couple of nights before."

"I know, but he said that staying at home makes it worse and he will be sending the kids with Rhiannon, I just couldn't say no."

"I know, but you should," Adam told him firmly. "Is the best for him."

"I don't know. I will let him come back and if he is not ready at least he will see that is not because I don't want him around."

"You are the boss, you know best," Adam shrugged. "Now tell me how do you feel."

TWTWTWTWTWTWTWTWTWTWTW

Something woke Ianto up, but he couldn't work what exactly in his half asleep state. Thinking it was Jack, but not wanting to risk being some robbery or even worse, he reached into the bedside drawer where he kept secretly from Jack a stun gun and slowly crept out of the room. He could hear the person making their way carefully but stealthfully down the steps. Reaching the end of the landing he looked carefully down the stairs and saw Jack retreating then opening the door and leavening the house.

Ianto threw the gun in frustration at the wall and almost let out a frustrated scream stifling it fast not to wake up the twins. His stomach rolled and he felt sick, as when he was so nervosa that he wanted to throw up. So Jack has left him again to go and brood on a roof. Even after that conversation, more of a roll really. Jack still wouldn't stay at home with him, he wondered if Jack was on the roof with that Adam, and what was their relationship really?

His stomach rolled again and he ran to the bathroom, he barely managed to open the lead of the toilet seat before he was violently sick in it. He worried for a moment that he was having another laps into Bulimia, he had made a conscious decision not to make himself throw up today, it was hard very hard but he knew that he had to stop if he wanted to be good at work. He remembered how hard it was the last time when he was a teenager but then he had done it for years, no it was just months. No, he it wasn't that, he was sick because of all his thoughts about Jack choosing to spend his time with this Adam person than with him and their children, even Gwen didn't seems so much of a problem right now. When he started to dry retch he rinsed his mouth and flushed the toilet. He thought that he should go and check on the kids and then go to bed, but he suddenly felt dizzy and only just made it to bed. Ianto wondered if he should mention these dizzy spells and easy tiredness that he had the last few weeks, but if he did Jack wouldn't let him back to work, so he decided against it, it was probably because of unhealthy eating, maybe when he started eating normally again everything would sort out.

TWTWTWTWTWTWTWTWTW

Gwen was in tears when she got back home. Jack had just dismissed her but then again he wasn't in a best shape as well. She hoped that now that he had some apparent domestic troubles Jack will come to her and they would be able to sooth each others pain. But he had told her to go home and plead with Rhys to take Anwen or stay with him, as if she didn't had any pride. Then he had ran off to Ianto Bloody Jones.

She couldn't go to Rhys and she didn't think she could deal with Anwen right now especially if she was teething again and would keep Gwen up half the night. She was too exhausted physically and psychically for this.

Brushing her tears off she decided to get some wine in front of the TV and let the crappy programme to take her mind off it, but it wasn't that easy, the moment she took a sip of her wine and turned the TV on, she thought of a woman who would never do that again after a long night at home, of a man who would never have to chose a bottle of wine for his wife again, and of a kid who will never see his parents again. The tears came back with full force. Gwen had to leave the glass on the coffee table because her hand started shaking with her body wracked by the sobs.

The nice of her apartment's door opening startled her and stopped the sobs. Instantly alert and in professional mood, she picked up her gun and stood up to confront the intruder. And there he was Captain John Hart in all his playboy glory. He was standing there by the door legs crossed at the ankles and body slouched on the wall. He looked smug but when he saw her tear-streaked face his demeanour changed.

"You alright Feckless?" John asked.

"What do you think?" Gwen replayed sharply

"Yeah stupid question I know," John said and approached her. He brushed a thump over her cheek she recoiled from his touch.

"What do you want Vera?" Gwen asked.

John leaned over her and whispered in her ear.

"I want to fuck you so hard that you will forget your own name."

Then he kissed her. It wasn't exactly what she wanted but at least was better than being alone.


End file.
